


Moment of Fear

by Palizinha



Series: StormPilot Moments [6]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-02
Updated: 2015-12-02
Packaged: 2018-05-04 13:27:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5335775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Palizinha/pseuds/Palizinha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Poe almost dies, Finn has to deal with his feelings, and how scared the idea of losing Poe makes him.</p>
<p>Prompt by an Anon through Tumblr</p>
            </blockquote>





	Moment of Fear

Finn had felt it.

Even before getting the warning after the attack that Poe was in the medical bay he had already known something was wrong.

It has been the longest two hours of his life.

It had started with a surprise attack by the First Order to the base they were currently in, one that their system had only caught too late. Everyone went to their posts and the battle started.

They had managed to make the First Order forces retreat, but halfway through the attack Finn felt something happen to Poe through the Force. He had spent the rest of the battle anxious and he knew it has something he would have to learn to control.

As soon as it was deemed safe he has been informed exactly what happened.

One of the TIEs was about to destroy Black 3's ship and Poe took a shot against it, but as he did it another of the TIEs managed to caught his ship and he crash landed. It could have been worse and he was put into a bacta tank as soon as possible, but the absolute terror Finn had felt still rung through his mind even as he looked at Poe.

Finn had never cared so much about one person, he had been taught most of his life to take losses in the battlefield like they were nothing. Because that's what Stormtroopers are, nothing, only a weapon. And when they die, it doesn't matter.

But as soon as he joined the Resistance, Finn started realizing that that's not how it was supposed to work. And for someone who had always cared too much, it had been good to know his instincts were right.

Maz Kanata's teachings went through his mind - Fear leads to the Dark Side, but you can feel it, everyone does. You just can't let it control you.

With Maz in mind he let his fear go, dispelling through the Force as he watched Poe and was reassured he would be fine soon.

But only dispelling it wasn't enough, he felt. Maybe he needed to vocalize it, to make peace with what he was feeling.

So he started talking even as he knew there would be no way Poe would hear him.

"We won. You would probably be glad to hear that considering how important the Resistance is to you. It is becoming just as important to me, too. Meeting you changed my life, Poe. I don't think I can even begin to explain to you how much. And when I thought you were going to die earlier, I don't think I was ever as scared. Not when I made the decision to leave the Order, not when I thought Kylo was going to kill me."

He stopped for a moment, trying to sort through his thoughts, to know what else he could say.

"I love you," It was something he had known for a while, but he hadn't said it aloud yet. He didn't think this truly counted as aloud either. He'd have to say it as soon as Poe woke up. "You are important to me in a way no one else has ever been. So when I tell you to be more careful in the air I'm not joking or being overprotective, I'm just scared I'm going to lose you. So... Get well soon, alright?"

"Poe would enjoy hearing that from you," Finn heard a voice behind him and was surprised to find General Organa there, they hadn't talked much, but he knew she cared about Poe. "He'd probably joke you were being cheesy," Both of them smiled at that. "It's good he has someone taking care of him now, I worry about him sometimes."

"Thank you, ma'am. I think I needed to hear that," Finn said quietly as he left the medical bay and Organa smiled at him.


End file.
